When I hear about book bannings and challenges and rescinded invitations to book fairs and college professors equating rape with porn, I honestly don't want to believe I share 99.9% of the same genetic material with these people and kind of want to move in with the orangutans at some zoo.
There is so much valuable information out there about Banned Books Week and how invaluable it is for us to fight, on every level, to keep books available for everybody. (List at end of this blog).
So I wondered, like every author out there, what could I do to add something of value?
I decided that I would add a little bit of fun. We're readers, writers, teachers, librarians, parents, aunts, waitresses, accountants, doctors, horse breeders, dog groomers ... and more. And we are CREATIVE!
So I'm putting together a BANNED BOOKS pack including: a signed copy of Ellen Hopkins' CRANK, Laurie Halse Anderson's SPEAK, Stephen Chbosky's THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER. And I'll throw in a signed copy of FREEZE FRAME (my first novel, never been banned, but I can't very well have a contest without sharing my own work!)-- A FOUR PACK OF BOOKS FOR DOING SOMETHING PRETTY FUN! (Two of which are signed)
So what do you have to do to win such a tantalizing prize?? Be creative! Find the most absurd reasons to ban a book, poem, song ... anything. SOMETHING FUNNY!
My lame example:
WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS: Dangerous!! Children might feel impelled to walk to the end of the sidewalk, off the curb, and twist their little ankles. Think of the tendons, bones, the endless days of ankle-wrapping! Insurance doesn't cover orthopedics! Children aren't supposed to walk off a sidewalk. That'd lead to mayhem. DANGEROUS!
If you can find a reason to ban a book that makes me laugh, you might just win! The sky's the limit!!
DEADLINE: Well, how about by October 4th? That gives you five and a half days to come up with reasons to ban books you never thought possible!! HAVE FUN! (Contest limited to USA, Canada and Colombia!)
Give us the reason and in the comments, please leave me your e-mail.
I will notify the winner the week after the contest ends and we'll crown you a creative book banner and everything. Maybe I'll throw in a Miss America-style sash.
Good luck and may the most ludicrous, ridiculous, and downright dumbfounding banned book prevail!
American Library Association
The Guardian
Cheryl Rainfield
Ellen Hopkins' Manifesto Poem
Grey's Anatomy (The book, not the show): Pornographic, grotesque. There are graphic depictions of the human body. Readers can look an any part of the body. All depictions are nude; some have been graphically mutilated!
ReplyDeleteDon't forget to leave me your e-mail!! THanks.
ReplyDeletemrsjenebear@mac.com
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder.
Where the Wild Things Are: Children making friends with monsters? What? NO! They're going to think they can walk up to any wild animal and just go tralala playing! Wild boars and tasmanian devils? They are not friendly or cute! Think of the mauling... the way the kids will think the growls and slashing of claws is cute and fun. This CANNOT happen! And the rabies! Insurance isn't going to cover RABIES shots. And kids HATE shots. And finally, The potential for DEATH. DEATH!
ReplyDelete=D flamingo1325 at gmail dot com
THE CURIOUS GARDEN by Peter Brown! The wild, uncontrolled growth of the garden in this book is an unmistakable symbol of immoral, perverted, disgusting sexual deviance! Deviance, I say! Deviance disguised as shrubbery!
ReplyDeletemike_jung(at)comcast(dot)net
These are funny!! I'm thinking...I'm thinking...
ReplyDeleteAnne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery: Being a red head myself I find it shocking, deplorable and absolutely horrible that Ms Montgomery would stoop so low to give a character (the main character at that) red hair. Doesn’t she know red heads have impossibly short fused tempers, get into all sorts of scrapes and find kindred sprits with the worst sorts?
ReplyDeleteHOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS...... Where should I start with this abominable piece of trash? First of all, the author is a total fraud: "Doctor" Suess? Doctor????? What would he have been able to accomplish in a medical emergency? The only thing Mr. Suess contributed to humanity is a despicable excuse for children’s literature that encourages such atrocities as listed below:
ReplyDelete1. The book is unabashedly blasphemous and seeks to defile the hallowed Christmas holiday.
2. The main character is a single man living alone… the homosexual undertones cannot be ignored.
3. The “Grinch” throughout the story engages in animal abuse, breaking and entering, grand larceny and impersonating an individual of authority.
4. Even more disturbing, however, are the implicit pedophiliac tendencies displayed by this supposed protagonist. How can we possibly allow our children to be exposed to a book where a grown man is lurking lasciviously in a young girl’s bedroom? Talk about “To Catch a Predator!”
Clearly, this book must be pulled from the shelves in order to protect the fragile innocence of our young people.
debbyreiser@hotmail.com
I was not bothered by Susan Patron's use of the word "scrotum" in THE HIGHER POWER OF LUCKY, but I was appalled that the dog's owner let him run around without his pants on! Children should not be allowed to read a book that has naked dogs in it.
ReplyDelete(you already know my email address)
Calvin and Hobbes. The boy is obviously mentally unstable, and he has no business playing with a tiger, real or fake! The line between reality and fiction is TOO UNCLEAR--my children might get the wrong idea, and start talking to their stuffed animals, or worse: a TIGER.
ReplyDelete( ohmywordiitsjasmine @ yahoo . com )
Impulse by Ellen Hopkins: Because oh my God, children and teenagers would learn about real problems and the fact that life is not always good, and that just can't happen, ever!
ReplyDeletenadjscr at hotmail com
I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN YOU!! Just in from a road trip and will send this slew of creative book banners to a panel (not me because, well, I'm not unbiased and already have a favorite!)
ReplyDeleteSo when the panel decides, THE CREATIVE BOOK BANNER will get all the glory and hoopla deserved!! Thank you all for participating!